Date: Thu, 13 May 1999 07:58:10 -0700
From: "natural born heretic" <redsrevolt-AT-ignmail.com>
Subject: Re: Fw: To The Jerry Springer Fans



---
You're gonna die! gonna die! gonna die for your government!  your going to die for your country like shit!
capitalism has made them this way, old fashioned fascism will take them away!
           ++++ stop de execution of Mumia Abu-Jamal ++++
   ++++ if you agree copy these 3 sentences in your own sig ++++
++++ more info: http://www.xs4all.nl/~tank/spg-l/sigaction.htm ++++
---When the time comes the ends will justify the means and nothing else will be taken into account nothing else will matter.  
You will find yourself surrounded by a world of hate and be asked to kill for it, but you will not, you will fight and kill 
them, kill them until they are dead, until the society is purged of fascists who are willing to kill out of spite and continue
martial practices against the people when there is stability in government.


On Thu, 13 May 1999 11:02:40   Ali Kazmi wrote:
>
>
>>>>>Subject: The Lowest Rated Jerry Springer Show Ever
>>>>>
>>>>> >>  Subject: FW: It beats "Oversexed Peroxided Trailer Trash"
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  The Lowest-Rated Jerry Springer Show Ever!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd: Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Today's guests are here because they can't agree on
>>>>> >>  fundamental philosophical principles. I'd like to welcome
>>>>> >>  Todd to the show.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd enters from backstage.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Hello, Todd.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: Hi, Jerry.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: (reading from card) So, Todd, you're here to tell
>>>>> >>  your girlfriend something. What is it?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: Well, Jerry, my girlfriend Ursula and I have been going out
>>>>> >>  for three years now. We did everything together. We were really
>>>>> >>  inseparable. But then she discovered post-Marxist political and
>>>>> >>  literary theory, and it's been nothing but fighting ever since.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Why is that?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: You see, Jerry, I'm a traditional Cartesian rationalist. I
>>>>> >>  believe that the individual self, the "I" or ego is the
>>>>> >>  foundation of all metaphysics. She, on the other hand, believes
>>>>> >>  that the contemporary self is a socially constructed,
>>>>> >>  multi-faceted subjectivity reflecting the political and economic
>>>>> >>  realities of late capitalist consumerist discourse.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd: Ooooohhhh!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: I know! I know! Is that infantile, or what?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: So what do you want to tell her today?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: I want to tell her that unless she ditches the
>>>>> >>  post-modernism, we're through. I just can't go on having a
>>>>> >>  relationship with a woman who doesn't believe I exist.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Well, you're going to get your chance. Here's Ursula!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula storms onstage and charges up to Todd.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: Patriarchal colonizer!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  She slaps him viciously. Todd leaps up, but the security guys
>>>>> >>  pull them apart before things can go any further.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: Don't listen to him! Logic is a male hysteria!
>>>>> >>  Rationality equals oppression and the silencing of marginalized
>>>>> >>  voices!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: The classical methodology of rational dialectic is our only
>>>>> >>  road to truth! Don't try to deny it!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: You and your dialectic! That's how it's been through our
>>>>> >>  whole relationship, Jerry. Mindless repetition of the
>>>>> >>  post-Enlightenment meta-narrative. "You have to start with
>>>>> >>  radical doubt, Ursula." "Post-structuralism is just classical
>>>>> >>  skeptical thought re-cast in the language of semiotics, Ursula."
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd: Booo! Booo!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Well, Ursula, come on. Don't you agree that the roots of
>>>>> >>  contemporary neo-Leftism simply have to be sought in
>>>>> >>  Enlightenment political philosophy?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: History is the discourse of powerful centrally located
>>>>> >>  voices marginalizing and de-scribing the sub-altern!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: See what I have to put up with? Do you know what it's like
>>>>> >>  living with someone who sees sex as a metaphoric demonstration of
>>>>> >>  the anti-feminist violence implicit in the discourse of the
>>>>> >>  dominant power structure? It's terrible. She just lies there and
>>>>> >>  thinks of Andrea Dworkin. That's why we never do it any more.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd: Wooooo!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: You liar! Why don't you tell them how you haven't been
>>>>> >>  able to get it up for the past three months because you couldn't
>>>>> >>  decide if your penis truly had essential Being, or was simply a
>>>>> >>  manifestation of Mind?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Todd: Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: It's true!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Well, I don't think we're going to solve this one right
>>>>> >>  away. Our next guests are Louis and Tina. And Tina has a little
>>>>> >>  confession to make! Louis and Tina come onstage. Todd and Ursula
>>>>> >>  continue bickering in the background.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Tina, you are... (reads cards) ... an existentialist, is
>>>>> >>  that right?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: That's right, Jerry. And Louis is, too.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: And what did you want to tell Louis today?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: Jerry, today I want to tell him...
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Talk to Louis. Talk to him.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd hushes.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: Louis... I've loved you for a long time...
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: I love you, too, Tina.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: Louis, you know I agree with you that existence precedes
>>>>> >>  essence, but...well, I just want to tell you I've been reading
>>>>> >>  Nietzsche lately, and I don't think I can agree with your
>>>>> >>  egalitarian politics any more.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Crowd: Wooooo! Woooooo!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: (shocked and disbelieving) Tina, this is crazy. You know
>>>>> >>  that Sartre clarified all this way back in the 40's.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: But he didn't take into account Nietzsche's radical
>>>>> >>  critique of democratic morality, Louis. I'm sorry. I can't ignore
>>>>> >>  the contradiction any longer!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: You got these ideas from Victor, didn't you? Didn't you?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: Don't you bring up Victor! I only turned to him when I saw
>>>>> >>  you were seeing that dominatrix! I needed a real man! An
>>>>> >>  uber-man!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: (sobbing) I couldn't help it. It was my burden of freedom.
>>>>> >>  It was too much!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: We've got someone here who might have something to add.
>>>>> >>  Bring out...Victor!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Victor enters. He walks up to Louis and sticks a finger in his
>>>>> >>  face. Victor: Louis, you're a classic post-Christian
>>>>> >>  intellectual. Weak to the core!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: (through tears) You can kiss my Marxist ass, Reactionary
>>>>> >>  Boy!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Victor: Herd animal!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis: Lackey!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Louis throws a chair at Victor; they lock horns and wrestle. The
>>>>> >>  crowd goes wild. After a long struggle, the security guys pry
>>>>> >>  them apart. Jerry: Okay, okay. It's time for questions from the
>>>>> >>  audience. Go ahead, sir.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Audience member: Okay, this is for Tina. Tina, I just wanna know
>>>>> >>  how you can call yourself an existentialist, and still agree with
>>>>> >>  Nietzsche's doctrine of the uebermensch. Doesn't that imply a
>>>>> >>  belief in intrinsic essences that is in direct contradiction with
>>>>> >>  the fundamental priniciples of existentialism?
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: No! No! It doesn't. We can be equal in potential, without
>>>>> >>  being equal in eventual personal quality. It's a question of
>>>>> >>  Becoming, not Being.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Audience member: That's just disguised essentialism! You're no
>>>>> >>  existentialist!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: I am so!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Audience member: You're no existentialist!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: I am so an existentialist, bitch!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula stands and interjects.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: What does it [bleep] matter? Existentialism is just a
>>>>> >>  cover for late capitalist anti-feminism! Look at how Sartre
>>>>> >>  treated Simone de Beauvoir! Women in the crowd cheer and stomp.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: [Bleep] you! Fat-ass Foucauldian ho!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: You only wish you were smart enough to understand
>>>>> >>  Foucault, bitch!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: You the bitch!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Ursula: No, you the bitch!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Tina: Whatever! Whatever!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: We'll be right back with a final thought! Stay with us!
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Commercial break for debt-consolidation loans, ITT Technical
>>>>> >>  Institute, and Psychic Alliance Hotline.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Jerry: Hi! Welcome back. I just want to thank all our guests for
>>>>> >>  being here, and say that I hope you're able to work through your
>>>>> >>  differences and find happiness, if indeed happiness can be
>>>>> >>  extracted from the dismal miasma of warring primal hormonal
>>>>> >>  impulses we call human relationship. (turns to the camera) Well,
>>>>> >>  we all think philosophy is just fun and games. Semiotics,
>>>>> >>  deconstruction, Lacanian post-Freudian psychoanalysis, it all
>>>>> >>  seems like good, clean fun. But when the heart gets involved, all
>>>>> >>  our painfully acquired metaphysical insights go right out the
>>>>> >>  window, and we're reduced to battling it out like rutting
>>>>> >>  chimpanzees. It's not pretty. If you're in a relationship, and
>>>>> >>  differences over the fundamental principles of your respective
>>>>> >>  subjectivities are making things difficult, maybe it's time to
>>>>> >>  move on. Find someone new, someone who will accept you and the
>>>>> >>  way your laughably limited human intelligence chooses to codify
>>>>> >>  and rationalize the chaos of existence. After all, in the absence
>>>>> >>  of a clear, unquestionable revelation from God, that's all we're
>>>>> >>  all doing anyway. So remember: take care of yourselves-and each
>>>>> >>  other.
>>>>> >>
>>>>> >>  Announcer: Be sure to tune in next time, when KKK strippers
>>>>> >>  battle it out with transvestite omnisexual porn stars! Tomorrow
>>>>> >>  on Springer!
>>>>> >>
Well, why can't Jerry springer always be like this, because well, I don't like finding out sisters are lesbian lovers and I hate when the transvestites come out on stage and tell theit male lovers that they are really men, I really hate that shit...though my cousin said on too hot for tv...jerry springer...they have a Black Panther and a KKK Grand Inquisitor...and the Black Panther beats the living fuck out of the white guy, I mean, couldn't that one have been live so they couldn't edit it out and then I would get to see some reall action on that show, those pussy fights with hair pulling and chair throwing really, really are getting on my nerves...



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