From: "john bechtel" <dsidnt-AT-hotmail.com>
Subject: New war strategy
Date: Sun, 10 Mar 2002 17:14:44 +0000




Finally a good idea!!

                           Later, John

>French Intellectuals to be Deployed in Afghanistan To Convince Taliban
>of Non-Existence of God.
>
>The ground war in Afghanistan hotted up yesterday when the Allies
>revealed plans to airdrop a platoon of crack French existentialist
>philosophers into the country to destroy the morale of Taliban zealots
>by proving the non-existence of God. Elements from the feared Jean-Paul
>Sartre Brigade, or 'Black Berets,' will be parachuted into the combat
>zones to spread doubt, despondency and existential anomie among the
>enemy. Hardened by numerous intellectual battles fought during their
>long occupation of Paris's Left Bank, their first action will be to
>establish a number of pavement cafes at strategic points near the front
>lines. There they will drink coffee and talk animatedly about the absurd
>nature of life and man's lonely isolation in the universe. They will be
>accompanied by a number of heartbreakingly beautiful girlfriends who
>will further spread dismay by sticking their tongues in the
>philosophers' ears every five minutes and looking remote and
>unattainable to everyone else.Their leader, Colonel Marc-Ange Belmondo,
>spoke yesterday of his confidence in the success of their mission.
>Sorbonne graduate Belmondo, a very intense and unshaven young man in a
>black pullover, gesticulated wildly and said, "The Taliban are caught in
>a logical fallacy of the most ridiculous. There is no God and I can
>prove it. Take your tongue out of my ear, Juliet, I am talking."
>Marc-Ange plans to deliver an impassioned thesis on man's nauseating
>freedom of action with special reference to the work of Foucault and the
>films of Alfred Hitchcock. However, humanitarian agencies have been
>quick to condemn the operation as inhumane, pointing out that the
>effects of passive smoking from the Frenchmens' endless Gitanes could
>wreak a terrible toll on civilians in the area.




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