Date: Tue, 31 Mar 1998 21:18:01 -0500
From: Yoshie Furuhashi <furuhashi.1-AT-osu.edu>
Subject: Re: M-TH: Re:  Porn


Li Trahn replies to me:
>Yoshie,wrote:
>> I think Doug is right here. Porn reassures straight guys by
>> showing
>> them that women are sexually interested in them. Straight guys need
>> this imaginary reassurance because sexism censures certain forms of
>> active female sexuality in real life and, also more importantly,
>> because they fear that women may _not_ be really interested in them,
>> sexually or otherwise.
>>
>> As for rape fantasies, moral censures of pornography tend to feed
>> off on *and* reinforce them.
>>
>> Yoshie

>      Yoshie,I am not sure I understand what you're saying here.Do
>you mean to say that straight guys feel threatened by Lesbians?

I think so, at least by lesbians who show no sexual interest in men. That's
why they say lesbinas are 'man-haters' while lesbians are in reality merely
indifferent to men sexually and/or prefer women to men.

>      Let me run this by you; why is it that guys don't feel
>threatened by bi-sexual women?I've had this discussion in mixed
>groups before and I find it odd that if you ask guys- 1."What would
>you do if you found out that your girlfriend was having a bi-sexual
>relationship?" The answer is usually that they wouldn't feel it was a
>threat to the relationship as opposed to her having an affair with
>another man, which they would consider a threat. Then there is what I
>think is the stupid answer some guys have:"well can I play to." That
>aside,are men more accepting of bi-sexual women then they are of
>Lesbian women?

I think that with bi women like myself, straight guys can think that "I
might have a chance," whereas with lesbians they won't have a chance.

Judging by many men's (except for Carrol C., Doug H, James H, and to a
lesser extent Hugh R) responses on to my comments about heterosexuality as
social construct on this list, it seems that the dethronement of
heterosexuality as naturalized norm is a huge threat to their
identity-fetish (i.e. normative straight masculinity.) Lesbians are a
threat to straight guys' sense of masculinity/identity-fetish in the same
way.

>     I think it should be kept in mind that older men may respond to
>this question in a totally different manner.I still think there's a
>contradiction here that I don't understand.
>    I suppose I could ask the guys on the list if they would feel
>threatened  by their girlfriend having a bi-sexual affair ?

BTW, I wasn't talking about the possibility of girlfriends having whatever
affairs threatening straight guys. I was/am talking about the existence of
lesbians in general, not this or that particular lesbian. It's a matter of
ideology and social relations, not a matter of "personal" affairs.

Yoshie




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