File spoon-archives/sa-cyborgs.archive/sa-cyborgs_1997/97-02-22.183, message 24


Date: Thu, 26 Sep 1996 11:03:26 -0700 (PDT)
From: Lakshmi Gopinathan Nair <lnair-AT-uclink2.berkeley.edu>
Subject: Surya


Here's an old poem I wrote:

Surya:


Where are you now?

Giving me so much 
Just to take it away?

This is too cruel

My body grows yellow and sick
with pallor.

Mother is relieved.

When will I feel your embrace again?
The fire of your kisses.

I wore the marks of our love
on my body
with pride.

You gave me a new skin
and the courage
to turn a deaf ear
to the lashing tongues
of gossips

Mother burned with shame.

Even if I tried to hide
the truth,
she could read
the tell-tale signs.
Is she not a woman too?

She lamented her fate
cursed with this dirty daughter
and her strange ideas.
Her repeated warnings
were to no avail.

"Who will want you now?"
she cried.

Perhaps she was only trying
to protect me.
Keeping me inside
even as a child
away from your gaze.

She taught me to fear you.

But you showed me
how to love
rebellion
With your gentle smiles,
and even your harsh embrace.

And for a short time
My smile
flashed whiter and brighter
against my 
arrogant darkness.

But now...




   

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