Date: Tue, 10 Aug 1999 19:53:09 -0400 (EDT)
Subject: virtuality and memory



a dream about memory?
___________________________________________________________________________

so what bounds one life, in the end?
what forces patrol borders 
between "real" and 
"virtual" self?

certain markers grow blurry
furry   they fade due into distance
due to fiction
due to friction
due to bleach and hot sun

biography: "this is what happened"
sub-title: "renata's life as a spy"
the book recalls listening 
tours with Hilary Clinton  
arm in arm they waltzed 
learning accents and faces
displacing places and names


at night now, she paces
dreams fables and nightmares
new fairy-tales set once again
in an old of fear

medieval bedtime stories: "Puss in Boots"
the men fear women, so they burn witches 
the men fear darkness, so they burn cats

the a Plague comes: fruit of men's labour
prize of their logic, their fire
the witches sizzle   the felines hiss
for years, a pyre rages 
then abruptly
there is no more 

no more ominous, waverly light
no more cats to eat rats
no more girls to clean house
enter diseases carried by rodents
enter bacteria and mice

slowly, invisible monsters creep into pillows
invisible beasties sleep tight under willows
invisible lice overtake 
pots and pans

in the dream, the lone men are sorry 
they pray for the women and cats to return
"arise from the dead!" they command
"use your unholy powers and come back!"
but for some mysterious reason, 
the charred corpses will not rise


delirious, the men begin hearing 
voices 
faint whispers at first, but then later
loud shrieks   a fever carresses 
their brains   rust-colored ice bites
their veins    they call out
"ja nie wiem."
"i forget how it happened."
"i didn't do it."
"i am dead."

centuries later, in a new village 
someone discovers a cat
a small cat, a black cat 
a cat with green eyes
"what creature is this?" he asks.
 
someone else says, "memory is like the ocean." 
"yes," he agrees, "memory is like riding a bike."
it all comes back, does it not?
no, perhaps not because no one 
in the village remembers 
owning a bicycle 
no one in the village remembers 
owning a cat.

a small child grows angry
she disapproves of their amnesia:
"i do not speak that language"
"i used to speak that language"
"i have not heard that accent before."
"where is your accent from?"
eyes on fire, they ask her sincerely
"are you a cat?"



what accent? she wonders, in the morning
what woman? what witch? what cat?
she wonders, shivers, in the morning
what was that nightmare about?







On Mon, 26 Jul 1999, Cyberdiva wrote:

> >SA-CYBORGS IS A LIST FOR INTERACTIVE CREATIVE EXPRESSION, BROUGHT TO YOU BY
> THE SPOON COLLECTIVE
> >
> >______________
> >
> >
> >*The theme* for this period starting July 1999 -
> >
> >The politics of "virtuality" in relation to place, race, gender, class,
> >caste and so on... 
> >________
> >
> >This list focuses on interactive, experimental creative writing with an
> >implicit focus on gender, race, class, caste etc identity issues pertaining
> >to voice and voicelessness, silence and resistance, Self and Other
> narratives...
> >
> >
> >If you have questions, send a message to radhik-AT-bgnet.bgsu.edu (Radhika
> >Gajjala - technical liason and moderator of sa-cyborgs)
> >
> >
> > What are the boundaries between "RL" (real life) and "VL" (virtual 
> >life) if any - what are the boundaries between "global" and "local" - where
> >are we going with writing (wrything) online, where writing is existence 
> >and not-writing disappears voices...
> >
> >what are the possibilities and (im) posssibilities of our 
> >transborgized selves merging textually into each other's context - the
> >implications of which are not yet fully (may never be fully) understood... 
> >what can we produce in these dangerous encounters of the "self" and "other" and
> >"other" as "self" - the blurring, the surfing, the wrything....
> > 
> > cyberculture and identity. wrything the cyborgian body.
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